Michelin gone flat

I love Italian food. Pizza, pasta, Monica Bellucci. Yummy.

A country that produces such a wonderful being can't do too badly with its cuisine, right? Yes. But at a restaurant tipped by some as Beijing' best Italian meal, the experience was, well, not exactly as awesome as Monica.

Sadler Ristorante (10- 65591399) was set up by Claudio Sadler, an Italian two-star Michelin chef - a rare find in Beijing where Michelin is known more for tyres than food. Nestled inside the lovely Chien'men 23, a calming enclave of Beijing I can never get sick of, the restaurant has a chic and clean decor, nicely lit in the day with generous daylight.

Some reviewers have even hailed the place as "Italian cuisine at its finest", so naturally, I went there with high expectations. But alas, the supposedly star-studded meal failed to move the heavens.

It got off to a really good start though. The bread basket (more plate than basket actually) came with five different types of dough delights and an amazing pre-appetiser before the three-course lunch. It was a mousse made from parmesan cheese, garnished with a crispy fried parmesan fritter and balsamic vinegar gelatin (below). Soft, creamy and a great spread on the warm and fluffy bread.

The dishes that followed were a little less impressive. The pasta appetiser was tasty but also a tad unusual on the palate - spaghetti tossed with zucchinis and cherry tomatoes, accompanied by dashes of green and brown sauces with a hint of fish stock and roasted vegetable and breadcrumbs (I think). It was just an all-round odd combination. The breadcrumbs in particular, did not go well with the spaghetti.

Next was seafood soup, very much like a stew of fish and shellfish. It was aromatic and the seafood, very fresh - always a treat in Beijing, where fresh seafood is as rare as clean air. But what spoilt it was the cous cous inside the soup. It soaked up the soup even before you could slurp much of it.

Finally, the dessert of panna cotta. It tasted of sweet vanilla, but somehow did not really sweeten the meal. Rather bland way to end a rather ordinary meal.

To be fair, the wine and wait staff were superb. The waiters and waitresses were friendly and attentive, without being overbearing. Also, I was there for the set lunch, which was about 160 yuan per person (without alcohol). Perhaps, just perhaps, the best is saved for dinner?

All-Star burger

I have not blogged for three months, and of course, it is not my fault. The darn Chinese government still refuses to lift the ban on Blogspot and it has been having a big buffet of events, leaving me with more meal times with Maggi than Maison Boulud.

But fret not, my dear clan of fans. The Forbidden Stomach is back from its three-month long diet! And it just ate a whopper of a meal. I have been wanting to try the All-Star Sports Bar & Grill ever since I read that Californians tagged its hamburgers as the next best thing to In-N-Out's.

Its burgers have also been named by a local magazine as the city's best last year. So naturally, I went for the cheese hotdog.

Thankfully, my friends had the good sense to order the All-Star Hamburgers and thankfully, I was shameless enough to just pinch their burgers. It was quite lovely and the reviews did not over hype it. There was horseradish and that gave it an extra bit of zing and the buns were well grilled with the edges dark brown and crispy. There was also a nice big juicy slice of tomato, which is always a treat for me. Add in a splash of hot sauce, and it is quite the perfect burger.


Can't say the same for my cheese hotdog though. It was decent enough, but nothing to shout about. If the hamburgers can match California's In-N-Out, the dogs aren't even close to Manhattan's Gray's Papayas. The side dishes were disappointing too. Coleslaw seemed to have some odd spices and the slim fries were nowhere close to McDonald's famed golden crisps.

But for the burger and the 65 plasma screens that broadcast just about any sports events in the world, it is worth a trip to this rather quiet and lonely strip by the edge of Solana Centre. It is supposed to operate round the clock, but call to check (10-5905-6999).

The Orchard Rude

After a rough week in Xinjiang, I was looking forward to a brunch excursion which I had tied down with a bunch of friends earlier. It is an "excursion" because unlike pretty much all the restaurants that I go to, The Orchard is in the boondocks of Beijing.

For good ol' Beijingers, it would not even be considered part of the city. The Orchard is located in Shunyi, some 30 minutes' drive from downtown and near the Fifth Ring Road - which means it is like the backside of Beijing.

But Shunyi is quite a piece of ass. Located near the airport, it has been developed into something like a mini-Florida suburb for expats, with big bungalows, gated communities and old people. Of course, such a crowd usually have quite a bit of renminbi to burn, so a nice crop of restaurants have popped up in this crevice of the capital.

The Orchard, which comes with a lake, is among the most famous and quite highly recommended by expats, especially those old enough to stay in Shunyi.


The restaurant is located in, yup, an orchard. It's supposedly a big deal because you see fruit trees. Why? I have no clue. I guess some city folk swoon and get orgasmic when they see fruit trees - "Check out those apples on the tree!! Wow!!". To me, they are just trees. Give me the juice anyday sir.

Still, I have to admit that it was nice to be in a fruit orchard on a Sunday afternoon. The Sun was out and its Beijing brother, the Smog, was there too. Ah, lovely. Sunny Beijing pollution. It's no wonder I missed this city when I was in Xinjiang.


But first impressions last and The Orchard screwed that up BIG BIG time with me. We reached the place at about 11.40am and since I was hungry, I decided to go check out the buffet spread. We were in a restaurant after all. If I wasn't thinking of looking for food, why be there? But no no no. The Orchard had other ideas. We were unceremoniously shooed out of the buffet area because brunch could only be served at 12 sharp. "You have to leave this area now!," commanded a waitress. Or maybe it was because she wasn't pleased that my friend astutely pointed out that there was a cockroach in the bread baskets. This door (below) was then slammed shut. Bitch.


Anyway, just before the door was closed, I took out my camera to snap a few pictures of the spread (not the roach), but the waitress barked: "You cannot take pictures here!" There was none of the, "I'm sorry Sir, but we do not allow photography in our premises." The rudeness cheesed me off big time. And to make things worse, I later saw signs plastered on the walls saying that if anyone wanted to take pics, they have to pay the restaurant 300 yuan for 30 minutes of shooting time.

Seriously, were they serving bread rolls on naked women? Who the hell in the right frame of mind would pay 300 yuan (that's about S$65) to take pictures? And at 180 yuan per person for the buffet (which is majorly expensive by Beijing's standards), I jolly well think I deserve to take pictures of the stuff I pay and eat.


I was hoping the food - continental spread - would salvage the outing, but I was sorely disappointed. Except for the bread which was quite fluffy and delicious when served without the roach, the other dishes were awfully ordinary. The roast beef was rather stiff and cream pasta was forgettable.


But the place was packed. Maybe that's why they can afford to be rude and harbour insects. I guess some people do like food in the boondocks. As for me, I will stick to the city. Not really an ass kind of man.

Quarter of peace

I have a feeling we are not in Beijing anymore.

Beautiful isn't it? It sure doesn't look like the Chinese capital. Clear blue skies, beautiful Spring sunshine and the lovely scent of manicured lawn. A jazz band playing to a tiny crowd. Kids running around, their parents' SUVs parked neatly by Western colonial buildings. It could have been a scene from any university towns in the US. But it is Beijing. In fact, it is right next to the heart of the city - the Tiananmen Square.

Named the Legation Quarter, this place can be best described to Singaporeans as Beijing's Chijmes. But it is far quieter, more exclusive and with a richer history. So named because it used to house embassies of Western powers in the last days of the Qing Dynasty, much of it was destroyed and vandalised because of the Cultural Revolution and Beijing's development. What's left is the former premises of the American Embassy and it now hosts restaurants and bars.


The top draw among the restaurants is Maison Boulud (10-6559-9200) - a Michelin-rated French restaurant by celebrity Manhattan chef Daniel Boulud. Located in a two-story European building with high ceilings and a grand double staircase, it screams high end from top to bottom. And since the closest I had been to a Michelin was when watching F1, it seemed about time for me to embrace the culinary tyre man.


I chose Sunday brunch. Because it was cheap. It was 98 yuan for a course, 158 for two and 208 for three. If you order four, it would be 238, but no one should be eating that much so don't be a greedy bastard and go for four courses. Anyway, it's a reasonable rate for a chef who once served President Barack Obama. Yes, as you can tell, I am so bragging. Have you had what Obama had? No? So there. Shuddup. It is not "Yes We Can". It is "Yes I Can".


The brunch got off to a good start with a lovely selection of pastries and danish, delightfully laid out on the table with flowers, slabs of butter and apple sauce among others.


The Fettucini Carbonara with poached yolk and black pepper pork belly was not too creamy, and with the yolk mixing in the pasta, it had a nice eggy stickiness.


But the real winner is the signature DB (named after the chef, not Donkey Balls) burger, which came with a thick layer of patty complete with pieces of foie gras. The accompanying fries were heavenly. I also had a bite of the Lamb on Ciabatta, with mayonnaise and some brown special sauce over the thin and soft slices of lamb.


Tribute must also be given to the service staff. Attentive, but not obsequious. Poised, but not arrogant. They earned every cent of the service charge. They go perfectly with Maison Boulud's classic early 20th century design.


But for Legation Quarter, the events of early 20th century have evidently still not passed it by. When I was leaving the compound, I noticed that the name "Legation Quarter" has been scratched out, leaving only "Qianmen 23" (its new name). After some research, I found out that the management has done away with the historic name - likely as a result of pressure from the government. The original Legation Quarter has remained a sore place for some Chinese, who see it as a sign of foreign aggression. The Western powers established the quarter after hammering the Qing government and they enjoyed extra-territorial rights in the complex. It is still regarded as a humiliating episode for many Chinese today.


It's yet another disappointing instance of unnecessary and overbearing Chinese nationalism. Shanghai's French Concession is still called the French Concession. I certainly don't see the Shanghainese moping around feeling humiliated. Isn't it a stronger nationalist statement that these places which once banned the natives are now still bearing the same name, but owned and patronised by Chinese?

Burgers without toothpicks

I'm usually not quite into what Singaporeans refer to broadly as "Western" food. On airplanes, I always choose the Oriental selection even if it's sucky fried noodles or tasteless fried rice. (Btw, Northwest Airlines, despite being one of the crappiest around, serves some really nice oily fried noodles).

But I actually have a secret fetish for American food, especially burgers and hot dogs. I think it has something to do with the Archie comics I read growing up. There was this character Jughead who was always eating burgers. He made them look damn yummy.

Still, I don't fancy those burgers served up at fast food joints. In-N-Out being an exception. But no one seems to have any plans to bring it to Singapore, or Asia for that matter, just yet. So I have had to settle for more upscale burger joints, where more effort is put in rather just slapping a patty between two buns. I am classy like that.

YF told me about Let's Burger at Sanlitun and swears by it. That means it is good shit. It was. First, the ambience is lovely, more cafe than diner. It looks quintessential European, quaint but not stuffy. A French contact who lives in Shenzhen visited me and I brought him here. He loved the place, saying that it could be in anywhere, London, Paris. Can't go wrong with a French appraisal right?


Yet the first thing that hits you after stepping into Let's Burger is the smell of grease - not exactly European but it is far more fragrant than the stale oil smell in American diners. The aroma of grilled beef patties wafting from the open kitchen, however, stays with you all the way home as it clings on to your clothes. But the laundry bill is worth it.


The burgers are succulent, soft and sinful. With more than a dozen to choose from, I had a tough time making up my mind as I stood by the counter (it's not fast food, but you still place your orders by the counter). The wait staff took pity on me and finally recommended the Australian Classic (98 yuan) - a hearty burger with double Ridgefield Farms Angus beef patties, topped with bacon and eggs. "It's very popular with the men," she said with a cheerful smile.

I went for the Paris Romantique (68 yuan) instead - single patty, beet and pickled relish. I am manly like that. The staff was probably trying to stifle a giggle, but it's ok, I am confident of my masculinity. And despite having a sissy name, Paris Romantique (below) packed a nice punch with the pickled relish. The buns were also done nicely, with a slight crisp top and big enough to hold the patty and all the gooey stuff in.


It's really important that a burger doesn't disintegrate. Some places do their big burgers tall, topping it with small buns. That makes it harder to keep the burger intact. Then they try to keep it together with a long toothpick. I hate that. Do you keep the toothpick and eat around it so as to keep the burger as a burger rather than a mess; or do you take away the toothpick and eat what was once a burger? I hate to have to make that decision. Let's Burger (10-5208-6036) makes it big, but wide, making sure that the burger stays firm and sturdy. Brilliant! The Hong Kong owners must have attended the hamburger college.

And did I mention the dipping sauces? Oh boy, there were 13 of them - from wasabi mayo to honey mustard to the usual chilli and ketchup - lined up in a row.


The best part is: You can take as much as you want, and they are free. Yes, it brought out the Singaporean in me. I wanted to sample all the sauces. But I didn't, lah. I just took the wasabi mayo...and you guessed it, the chilli sauce.

Pink fruity LKY

Hi, I would like the ham and eggs with a side of pancakes. Oh yes, give me a Lee Kuan Yew too. But serve it before the coffee please, thanks, xie xie.

Life throws you the strangest curve balls sometimes. You go looking for brunch on a sunny Spring day and the "Minister Mentor" pops up on a menu. Yup, just like that, No. 67, Lee Kwan Yew (see below, second column, second from bottom). The wrong spelling may be intentional to avoid legal problems. But that's just my guess.


Anyway, for some strange reason, Blue Frog restaurant decided to name one of its 100 shots after Singapore's dear leader, giving LKY pride of place alongside Chairman Mao, Tony Blair, John Howard and Nelson Mandela. No place for Deng Xiaoping. I guess the criteria must be height.


Although it seemed odd to have a shot before brunch, I just could not turn down the chance to down an LKY for 30 yuan (about S$6). I was tempted to go for the leaders' platter (5 shots for 130 yuan), but after seeing another shot named Ken, I had to have it. It's a tribute to a buddy who once went one on one with the old man. Five shots before bacon seem a little excessive anyway.

LKY the drink arrived and it was a shocking pink (below: on the right, Ken is dark brown on the left). Took a quick gulp and it was, erm, fruity. A LKY shot that is pink and fruity, haha, who would have thought? I was expecting it to be robust, hard and white. It also tasted somewhat like cough mixture - certainly not the minister mentor of drinks.


Still, at least Blue Frog served up a sumptuous brunch which would make the Gifted programme of any meritocratic streaming food system. Its Big Blue plate (85 yuan, below) is certified elitist. Scrambled eggs, bacon, sausage, ham, diced potatoes, two pancakes, a slice of bread and a cup of coffee. It's definitely an A++.


But if you have abnormal heart rhythm, it may be advisable to go for the Two Eggs selection (60 yuan), which is similar to the Big Blue but minus the pancakes and only bacon OR ham OR sausage. Brunch goes from 10am to 4pm, which means you can laze in bed like you would during a Singapore Elections' polling day and then go for a nice long brunch since in all likelihood you wouldn't have a chance to vote anyway.

But unlike a Singapore GE, the LKY in this instance is not a definite winner.